Shart-Scented Phone Finds New Home

I flushed my phone down the toilet a couple weeks ago. You always hear about people dropping their phones in the toilet but who actually flushes it too? It must have been half hanging out of the pocket of my hoodie and fell out at the exact same time I reached to flush the toilet. The sound startled me but I didn't know what it was at first; I thought I had knocked the toilet seat down. I only realized what had happened when a minute or two later, I heard the voice of a British lady: "It is 6 o'clock. Time to get up. It is 6 o'clock. Time to get up." My alarm snooze going off. From my toilet.

The teachers got a good laugh about it at school. I joked that it would have been funny if the British lady's voice had sounded like it were coming from underwater. That same day, I got a new SIM card with the same number and my old credit on it free of charge from the phone service company and my host cousin gave me his old phone. Everything turned out alright...

Until a couple days later I discovered my toilet was clogged. (I warn you now, I will spare you no details.) I found this out the hard way on a not-unusual day in Thailand when I had diarrhea. Not everything was going down like it is supposed to. I tried to unclog the toilet, first with an auger, or plumbing snake (I didn't know what this was until I had to use it). That didn't work even after several attempts. Then I tried a plunger - but imagine a plunger with a short handle so that only one hand can grasp it. This requires you to get closer to the toilet. This is what I was using. (Side note: I had started out using rubber gloves, but by this time I had given up trying to keep my hands clean and taken them off.)

I couldn't unclog it. My host cousin had to help me. He cut open the pipe leading from my toilet under my house to the septic tank. After trying to shove several things up the toilet to dislodge the phone, including my hand, the plumbing snake, and a wire coat hanger, we (he) pushed the phone up and out of the toilet using a water hose. My host cousin joked that I should hang the cell phone on my bathroom wall as a souvenir. I said it would make for a sh*tty air freshener.


Edited (5/14/12): Thanks for the title, Jeremy!